Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Late Night Dreaming

I wonder, if you could see me now, would you be disappointed? Would you look away in shame, bow your head and stare at the floor in disgust?

Have I become just like him?

A quick flash of temper, a deep stirring rage that gives no pause to thought as it manifests itself in a snarl and a near deadly strike.

What would you think of me now?

Apparently abused children are abusive parents, abusive to others. Is that an excuse to pardon myself from the disgust that wells up inside, a simple and easy explanation to shove back at the guilt of my actions the pain that I feel because of the pain that I've caused?

What would you think of me now...?

What changed in me, and what can I do to change?

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